Granted... I don't often get (or take) the opportunity to paint over the weekend; unless my husband has something that takes him out of the house (He plays various table top games like DropZone, and Warhammer 40K etc...) But today is Tuesday... and I'm already finding any excuse to avoid making progress on my NaMoPaiMo horse.
In the last year... for reasons I can't completely explain... I've developed a tentativeness, or maybe an insecurity is more accurate, when painting one of my favorite colors... Buckskin.
Once upon a time... I could paint any shade of buckskin... almost in my sleep. While I don't keep "recipes" written down anywhere (I very much paint by feel, and intuition as to what colors a particular model needs), I do have certain colors mapped out in my head. Buckskin, has always been one of those colors.
And yet... in the last year or so... I've hit a wall. For reasons I can't quite fathom... I no longer trust that I know which color to lay down next.
More than likely... this mental "block"... probably stems from the long stint of time between today, and the last time I actually finished a buckskin model. Or even a Palomino for that matter.
In the last year or so... I've started, and stalled, on several Buckskin and Palomino models. And I've found, that when I put those models down, and walk away from them...leaving them incomplete... it can be REALLY hard to pick them back up and finish them.
And so... I've been stuck in this awful loop... for months, if not longer.
This... is why I need to participate in NaMoPaiMo. I need the impetus... to help me take a model from start to finish, in a set amount of time. I need the paintjob to end successfully... so that I can break myself out of this endless loop of doubt and insecurity... in order to carry that momentum into those other, unfinished models.
If this month ends well... I won't just finish this single Mini... I'll hopefully be able to spray the final layers on at least half a dozen other models, and clear my workbench a bit!
End of Day 3... not much change since
PS: My insecurity also extends into writing this blog! I definitely feel out of practice when it comes to writing anything of more significance than an email! Haha!
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